Knowing Him

A Mark of True Confidence


There’s a really sweet girl in this great blogosphere world that I’ve bee able to connect with over the past few months. Recently, one of her posts went viral – VI!!! RAL!!!! She is an amazing, genuine and passionate writer and it’s been exciting to see it all happen for her!

However, blogging has become one of my passions .. so, if I’m going to be completely honest with myself, I must admit that there has been a stream of jealousy flowing through my mind. One that ripples with thoughts of “But I want…”, “I wish…”, “Why can’t I have…”.

Jealousy is a hard emotion to accept possession of. I don’t like it. It’s not a good feeling to feel. And I definitely don’t want others aware I’m dealing with it.  So alongside it there is usually an undercurrent of pride that relentlessly attempts to drown it out with persuading whispers of “You’re not really jealous..” “Just pretend it’s not there and it will go away..”.

As I have already learned many times – suppressing emotions means that they will almost always find their way back to haunt me.

We all have passions and desires. We all have ways that we want the Lord to use us..

Maybe it’s leading worship.

maybe being a pastor.

maybe a writer

a motivational speaker

a missionary

a musician

an artist

an athlete

..a parent

Jealousy can pierce our hearts so easily and covertly when we see others around us excel in the areas in which we long to shine.

This, I believe (like so many other things) comes back to that infamous friend of ours. Fear. It speaks in it’s voice of doubt, condemnation and anxiety – that we will be forgotten, replaced, overlooked and unseen in the dust of others success.

We could very easily attribute this to wrong motives, ego, seeking our own glory.. which maybe very true!! We gotta allow the Holy Spirit to search that out in us. But I think that is an explanation we have heard a thousand times..we know that our motives need to be to bring God glory, right!?! And hopefully we are asking the Holy Spirit to help us abide in and apprehend this understanding.

But, let’s face it – we still battle with jealousy!! Especially us women!!

Instead of this stemming from an issue of wrong motive, I would suggest that it’s rooted in something deeper.

It’s an issue of mistaken identity.

I was reading in John 13 the other day and came across this passage.

Jesus, knowing that the Father had given all things into his hands, and that he had come from God and was going back to God, rose from supper. He laid aside his outer garments, and taking a towel, tied it around his waist. Then he poured water into a basin and began to wash the disciples’ feet and to wipe them with the towel that was wrapped around him. – John 13:3-5

Jesus knew who He was and where He was going. He was completely confident in the security of his identity and the security of His future. Therefore, He – the Son of God was able to humble himself to assume the position of a servant and wash His disciples feet.

He did this as an example to us.

I believe there is a principle we can take away from this:

We are not able to truly consider others above ourselves until we know… we know!!… we KNOW!! in our heads, in our hearts and in our spirit WHO WE ARE and the HOPE of OUR FUTURE!

When those feeling of jealousy rise in me, the best thing I can do is to first confess it, then remind myself of truth…

… I belong to God, the Creator of heaven and earth; that I am loved by Him and that my future lies with Him, a future that will never spoil or fade; He has a plan and a purpose for me which is unique from anyone else – a plan to bring about His purpose and will. If I trust Him, He will fill my life with excitement, adventure and joy as He uses me according to the dreams He has placed in my heart.

The moments that I am able to rejoice with the people around me as God uses them in the ways I long Him to use me, without jealousy – this is a good indicator that I am truly secure in my identity in Christ.


11 thoughts on “A Mark of True Confidence

  1. The thing I appreciate about your writing is that it is transparent and Christ centered. I have been able to read more and more mommy blogs but your heart stands out as one truly eager to glorify God first and foremost… and that is refreshing. I was telling someone that while I love to blog… it is an uncomfortable thing because it makes me vulnerable and insecure at times. But then God graciously reminds me… that I am doing it for Him! And praise Him that He could use us for His purposes. 🙂

    1. Thanks so much, Kim! That is my hope!..that what I write brings Him glory. This was a hard post to write for that’s hard to admit when I fall into that place of seeking the glory for myself.. then I have to remind myself that I do this for Him – just like you!! Blessings to you! 🙂

  2. What a great message for Christians today! Once we learn to use the gifts we’ve been given to the fullest (instead of asking God why He didn’t give us our neighbors’ gifts) the entire Body of Christ is able to function in a more powerful and streamlined way… It isn’t always easy to have this attitude, but I think it has the power to make a dramatic impact!

    1. Amen! Great thoughts! We are the most useful/powerful in God’s kingdom when we are just trying to be ourselves..who God made “me” to be – not trying to duplicate someone else..(hopefully that makes sense).

  3. I don’t often respond to you blog posts here. I think you’ve just nailed the reason. Jealousy because all your wonderful blogger friends have so much wisdom to share with you, and fear that I won’t measure up. When I read the list you wrote of ways that the Lord may want to use us, I see that he has used used you in so many of those ways. If only we could rid ourselves of all self doubt, and have faith that he is using us exactly as he has planned. We could then say to ourselves “I am enough”. Great post Megan!

  4. Megan, you are a breath of fresh and honest air! You just keep showing the rest of us your sweet and humble heart, and, hopefully everyone reading it will be transformed by your gentle words. And, even more importantly, that God, will be smiling, applauding, and proud to call you His Amazing Daughter!

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